Little Orangey Raiding Hood
cocky and bullish too
spit on our lady’s torch,
shorting out her light.
Bellicose as Old King Cole
merry in his big white house
decorated by special order,
he stuccoed it with lye.
Kitchen menu his design,
donkey stew cooked on high,
boiling for a long reduction
still kickin’ in the pot.
Uneasy with house chairs,
too soft, none just right.
No match to for his needs,
only gilded throne will do.
Upstairs to try the beds
too short, too long.
Ah just right, finally to sleep.
Bird twitter starts at dawn.
Fitful dreams of Miss Tuffet
savoring curds and whey.
Spiders crawl out from covers,
itsy bitsy never more.
Awakened by Fox and hounds
he calls for cavorters three.
Get my breakfast pie
and put that crown upon my head!
Then, oh so gleefully,
in goes his royal thumb
ready for a veritable plum.
YEEEEOW!
Inside that massive flakey crust
five and twenty blackbirds
baked in a bordered row.
Oh no! He’ll have to eat crow!
And now this silly poem must stop
although the tale itself does not.
Guess its ending from sounds you hear
louder, louder, more and more
that huffing puffing at his door.

Written for dVerse, the virtual pub for poets where I’m hosting Tuesday Poetics, asking folks to write a poem, serious or humorous, that somehow deals with opposites or antithesis. Folks can include simple opposite words such as light/dark, good/bad in the poem; look at one event from two opposite view points; or take a nursery rhyme and write it in an opposite way — instead of There was an old woman who lived in a shoe – make it a man! In this post, I’ve satirically dealt with a number of different nursery rhymes, changing their meaning completely. For a more serious take on the prompt, go to my poem Hovering In Absentia.